He's rude and
he's crude.
He's walk dude.
Here's
how the ratings work.
An
indispensable requirement on starting for a journey is good humour,
and a predisposition to be pleased and contented with what falls in
your
way.
—
Charles Boner, Guide
for Travellers, In the Plain and On the Mountain, (1876)
p. 3
Overall,
I like varied walks, so I'm
inclined to give highish rating to most good walks.
However, what a "good walk" is depends on what you enjoy. There's a
vast difference between a long, wild walk in the bush (bush-whacking,
we call it around here — when you head out into the bush, following no
trail) and a short and sedate urban walk.
I assume readers
will take this into consideration when they see very different kinds of
walks get the same walk dudes rating.
When appropriate, I also note whether a walk is easy, moderate or
strenuous. An easy walk means you could take your toddler without much
fuss. Moderate means a few hills and maybe a few slightly tough spots
to negotiate (a stony dry bed, a marshy bit, a bit of a mild stream to
ford, etc). Strenuous, means lots of ups and downs, some rough trail,
perhaps a bit of mild climbing, some rock dancing over streams and so
on.
The Ratings
Pretty boring.
Decent. Could have minor drawbacks.
Good place to visit. Lots to see.
Excellent walk. Long or short, it's great.
World class. Top of the line walk.
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Walking
With the Devil
There
are some walks that are super boring, dangerous, ugly or just
plain evil. Unless you're connecting two walks to create a thread, you
want to avoid these places.
I've
created a little devil to denote such walks. I also use him alongside
walk dude if there are particular dangers, like ATVs and the like.
You won't see him too often.
He's
got a fine tee shirt on with 666 on his chest.
Speaking
of devils, below is a painting by William Blake. It's
in the Rosenbach
Museum and Library in Philadelphia. Guess my devil will never
make
it into the museum.
The
Number of the Beast is 666.
William
Blake.
The
Number of the Beast is 666.
Peter
R. Snell
(Compare and contrast Blake and Snell. Remember "childlike simplicity"
can be effective. Possibly.)
 I'm
not sure about my devil, but Walk Dude would make a fine
companion
for Mr. Canoehead, who is featured on signs on canoe portages. He was
also a character in an old CBC comedy group, the Frantics. The
voiceover introducing the segment described him thus:
- "Mr.
Canoehead.
- Once
a mild-mannered insurance salesman
- Who
one day while portaging his aluminum canoe in
Algonquin Park
- Was
suddenly hit by a giant bolt of lightning
- (Yeeeow
- I've been hit by lightning! You were hit by lightning!)
- And
had the canoe welded to his head
- (You're
right, it's stuck to your head!)
- Mr.
Canoehead,
- Canada's
Greatest Aluminum Crimefighter!
- Brother
of Ted (That's me!)
- Our
story continues..."
Mr.
Canoehead would fight crimes. He'd stop criminals in their tracks by
rotating his canoe wildly back and forth, shouting lines like, "Taste,
gunwales!" reducing his foe to pulp. Here's a really rough YouTube of
the first
episode. Canadians! Learn your culture here. Everyone else!
Groove on Canadian high culture.
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